I feel my body slow as I am able to release the tension of the change in situation but I then feel it heighten, again. I put nervousness about the door away and the anticipation of what Mr. Baldwin has conjured up replaces it. I don’t look but two of the men stop next to me and their hands rub my ass. I don’t look because Mr. Baldwin has made eye contact with me and there is a mischievous grin on his face. His cock is semi-hard, sticking out in front of him. He is bigger than the others by a couple inches. There I go again, thinking about size. But I smile. I do so enjoy having a cock like that to please … and enjoy.My hands drop and they find the cock of the two men next to me. They are both hard. My own body is energized … ready for anything Mr. Baldwin might have in mind … whatever it is … suggestion to the men … expectation for me. The difference is thrilling. I know that whatever he is thinking he expects me to do and I am certain to fulfill because he expects it. It is. ’ ‘Why do you say that? It seems you and your wife separately deliver your children’s needs although you’re not committed to her.’ ‘And the children suffer. But you win. I don’t want more commitment. Commitment is bad because it means you’re not self-sufficient and others might let you down.’ He turns away from her searching gaze and doesn’t like this conversation. He has no wish to explain to Hazel why he’s no longer committed to Caroline. His failed marriage, for him, is a humiliation and not a proper subject for discussion. And he’s frustrated with himself because what he’d really like is a little sympathy for his plight and for her to show he matters to her. Pathetic. Beyond that, he struggles to understand what he wants from Hazel. She’s not easy by any meaning of the word and yet he looks forward to her company. Is it because he’s lonely or because he needs a relationship to prove he’s not a failure? He even wonders whether he’s instinctively searching for a partner to help.
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